In oglinda - Confesiuni in miez de noapte

As fi vrut de mult sa-ti spun cate ceva, dar de fiecare data cand am vrut sa fac asta cumva m-am temut de
cum vei reactiona, dar azi, pentru un anume motiv, am decis ca o confesiune ti-ar prinde bine.
Te-am vazut azi zambind si pentru prima oara de cand traiesc am vazut ca zambesti sincer si m-am bucurat sa te vad asa.
Stii.. esti genul de persoana care de obicei prefera sa se ascunda intr-o carapace de nepatruns unde nimic nu trece, fie ea fericire, bucurie, tristete... nimic. Am stat si m-am gandit, oare ce raza de soare ti-a mangaiat chipul azi, oare te-ai uitat in ultimul timp sincer in ochii tai sa vezi cat de mult te poate schimba o zi in care esti sincer cu tine si recunosti ca momentele frumoase sunt si ele binevenite?! Mi-as dori sa te vad asa mai des, emanand voie buna si o aura care ar face invidiosi o multime de indivizi. Intotdeauna ti-am admirat personalitatea de neatins si atitudinea de om puternic, vertical, dar rece. Atat de rece incat uneori am impresia ca-ti iubesti singuratatea si locul rece de pe perna ce sta langa tine. Noaptea, uneori, te mai privesc sa-ti urmaresc pulsul si gingasia si as vrea sa-ti zic c-ai inceput sa visezi din nou si asta inseamna ca ceva se intampla in universul ala al tau. As vrea sa felicit persoana care a reusit, cu siguranta a meritat.
N-as vrea sa te sperii sau sa-ti zic ca e neaparat ceva permanent, stii cum e vorba aia, dragostea e un joc periculos, mai ales daca e jucat de cine nu trebuie, dar as vrea sa-ti incurajez schimbarea si sa-ti zic sa nu uiti sa fii om- nu ca n-ai fi- dar partea sensibila a ta n-as trebui sa dispara. Mi-as dori sa te vad plangand de fericire din nou, am si uitat cand te-am vazut ca te-ai bucurat ultima data de o raza de soare, de chipul tau frumos, de prieteni, de distractie, de altceva inafara de bula aia mica in care esti mereu.
Stii ca nu ma insel niciodata si sper ca si de data asta sa ma iubesti la fel de mult ca pe jumatatea cealalta, la urma urmei suntem suflete pereche, iar dragostea mea fata de tine va ramane la fel.
Nu ma uita si de data asta.

                                  

Conținuturi cu substrat

I look myself in the mirror and I see something changed on my face, my skin, my everything.
I have a strange feeling when I see myself, something is definitely different. I might say that everything is because of you, even though I will never admit that you you, I think you might get scared.
There are moments when I cannot believe that I am finally smiling a big part of the day and actually mean it, and it's the kind of moment I want to keep for the longest I can get.
When you first looked at me I felt that something is going to change, I did not know if it's going to be good or not, but it was a moment that I was expecting for quite some time. I must sound so childish right now, but is late at night, I look at the moon and I find it so amazing, and you know I'm not into romance, but I am starting to love these kind of moment when no matter what I do I imagine you smiling and encouraging me that life is not so bad if you enjoy the nice moments once in a while. When you look at me ( and not just physically) I really feel that you want to understand me and make me feel better, stronger and happier.
Sometimes I hate that I cannot know or figure out what the future wants to give me, but I know that no matter how this is going to end, you'll be there as a friend that I will always cherish and have no matter what. And I have to tell you, I feel confident and for once in my life I am seeing myself beautiful, but in your eyes, and that matters more than anything.
I know that I am not that beautiful or near to be perfect, but when I look in your eyes I see myself happy, and happiness, my dear, is something that i craved for since I first opened my eyes. I know you probably don't see it in my eyes, but when you kiss me and smile and when you make me laugh, I want to keep you so close to my heart just to feel shivers. It is a feeling not worth describing with simple words, but with something that matters. Most likely you will never know and I don't even know if you care, but the happiness that I have now because of you will remain in my heart.
Most likely you'll laugh and find this like a teenage crush, but it doesn't even matter that much right now in my head, 'cause I can see myself going for my dreams and my hopes, for once I am finding myself capable of doing something with me- 'something' that makes me go beyond my powers, in a good way, of course, and you already know confidence is what I lack most of times.
And I am feeling confident around you, it's the kind of feeling that makes me just want to kiss you in front of everyone, and not to brag or anything like that, but to show everyone that I know to be happy too. 
The way you touch my skin, hold my hands, and even the way you speak sometimes takes me to a place in my heart that I have locked and lost- or thought I lost- I thought I'll never try to love again, or to allow my heart to open up like I did in the past so easily. Even when I'm telling you I had a bad day it doesn't feel so bad anymore when you're saying " You know everything is going to be just fine as long as we have each other".
I want all in and I want you.